“Experience is not what happens to you. Experience is what you DO with what happens to you”
Insanity is
described by one wise guy as “Doing the same thing over and over again and
expecting different results” if somebody does not like the music coming from
one radio station all they need to do is change the channel. Complaining about
the bad songs will not make the music disappear. If you want to get rid of the
cold in your room, complaining about the cold will not make the cold to go away.
Just turn on the heater and the warmth will replace the cold. Many people do
not know how to react to problems and they think worrying or complaining about
how bad things are, is equivalent to doing something about the problem. If you
want to get rid of negative thoughts, don’t complain about the negative
thoughts, just start thinking about something positive and keep doing it
repeatedly until it forms into your habit. Let’s learn some lessons from the
following story on an experiment with pigeons as told by Michael Josephson
During an
experiment, pigeons were put in cages with one green and one red button.
In one cage, if the birds pecked the green button they would get food every
time. In the other, the green button yielded food erratically and the pigeons
had to persist to get enough food. In both cases, pecking the red button
did nothing. Both sets of birds thrived, learning what they had to do to
survive and to ignore the red button that yielded no food. But when the
birds that were used to getting a reward every time were put in the cage that
fed them only occasionally, they failed to adapt; they hit their heads against
the cage and pecked wildly at everything in sight.
There are two
worthwhile lessons from this study. First, the pigeons quickly learned
from experience to avoid the red button because it was unproductive.
There are lots of people who would lead smoother and happier lives if they just
stopped pushing red buttons that never give them what they want.
Second, even birds
who have it too easy get spoiled and develop an entitlement mentality that
prevents them from adapting to situations where they can solve their problems
if they just work harder. Some people are like that too. They don’t
deal well with new circumstances especially those that require persistence.
Part of being
responsible is learning from experience to appreciate the benefits of tenacity
and the wisdom of avoiding useless, harmful and self-defeating patterns of
behavior.
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